A Tech Supports Worst Nightmare. - Jobs


	A Tech Supports Worst Nightmare.	View full version
User #189453 88 posts RanCid Participant	Just want to know the worst calls you guys have ever received. I believe my worst is any call including an old lady and Win95. you?	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 2pm AEST
User #69241 1789 posts sp0rkz Whirlpool Enthusiast	Ahhh tech support, so glad I don't do that anymore :) I had a guy threaten to bad mouth the company I worked for (who hardly had a stellar reputation anyway) on numerous forums on which he was a prominent member.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 2pm AEST
User #191588 19 posts woopawoopa I'm new here, please be nice	The best one I heard of was a roll out of PC's for country folk the phone call went something like: Tech: I need you to right click your mouse User: I dont see how thats going to help Tech: Trust me right click your mouse User: Dont treat me like an Idiot Tech: Im not please just right click on your mouse User: Alright Im clicking my right hand over the mouse and nothing is happening	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 2pm AEST
User #189453 88 posts RanCid Participant	woopawoopa writes... User: Dont treat me like an Idiot Classic.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 2pm AEST
User #30667 1468 posts Unknown Designer Whirlpool Enthusiast	Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I worked helpdesk: Me: Good after noon, crappy ISP, how can I help you? Customer: Hi, I can't find this file on this webpage I used to go to. Me: can you tell me the name of the website? Customer: it's just some numbers and then some words. Me: That's fine. Customer: 64.*..**/img Me: Ok, I'll just have a look ... Jesus! Question, what was the site that he took me to? A) Goatse B) A site focused on CP C) a broken link. For those who guessed A or C you get points for hoping. I reported it to my managers who did nothing. So I reported it to the police but they never got back to me. I quit doing front line support for ISPs and went into internal customer support before getting out of support all together. It was all together the worst day of my working career. EDIT: Woops, fixed B for C. The guy really did shoot me to a CP site ... :(	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #189453 88 posts RanCid Participant	Your worst day was because of a broken link?	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #92648 2566 posts beardedgeek Whirlpool Forums Addict	i think b and c got swapped.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #97310 115 posts classlessroute Forum Regular	c goat sex.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #114570 1494 posts apacheoutlaw In the penalty box	I got called flapping scum on one of my first days. Why exactly he was pissed I don't know it got elevated. I'd rather become a courier or something than ever do support again. Worst job in the world imo.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #7117 4551 posts WarT Section Moderator	apacheoutlaw writes... I'd rather become a courier or something than ever do support again. Worst job in the world imo. Private company support is generally fine, support for the general public however is where problems are.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 3pm AEST
User #9721 15533 posts Torytroll Whirlpool Forums Addict	RanCid writes... Just want to know the worst calls you guys have ever received. ToryTroll: "Okay, tell me what's on your desktop." Luser: "Ummmmm, a keyboard, a mouse, a coffee cup........." Actually the worst one was, TT: "Okay, what operating system are you using?" Luser: "Windows 97" TT: "You mean Windows 95" Luser: "Whatever" 45 minutes later TT: "No, we don't seem to be getting anywhere. What do you see in the very top left hand corner?" Luser: "Well, there's this little Apple symbol"	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 5pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-20, 5pm AEST
User #62440 6737 posts ~SiNEWAVE~ Whirlpool Forums Addict	Unknown Designer writes... Question, what was the site that he took me to? You just gave me a evil idea :)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 5pm AEST
User #136073 377 posts Chrizz Forum Regular	~SiNEWAVE~ writes... Unknown Designer writes... Question, what was the site that he took me to? You just gave me a evil idea :) I God damn hope not?	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 6pm AEST
User #84502 130 posts Luke Harris Westnet ISP Representative	Hehe, a lot of this stuff seems pretty tame guys. I've got hundreds of nightmare stories, but can only recall one right now that's safe enough for me to relate. About 2 years ago I had the pleasure of spending about an hour and 30 minutes, (an hour of this being after my shift had actually ended), late one week night trying to explain to a hot headed customer why the anti spam software from ISP A, (moi), will not scan inbound mail from Domain B, (another provider). This guy abused the hell out of me for ages because he was simply embarrassed at his own misunderstanding of the concept. He even shouted on a few occasions "Well why did you sign me up for the service then?!". ... "Err, because you asked us to?". Then the customer had the idea of setting up a forward from his Domain B address to the address he had with ISP A, and email scanning, effectively trying to get cheaper scanning through us and not his more expensive domain provider. Boy was he miffed when I pointed out, "Unfortunately that won't work, as the message is forwarded the software automatically ingnores the message as it's deemed to be wanted mail." But I was nice, through clenched teeth. Much fun.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 6pm AEST
User #52265 298 posts DeMOn Forum Regular	Luke Harris writes... "Well why did you sign me up for the service then?!". ... "Err, because you asked us to?". Haha that's funny. I get the random support calls as well, when an end customer using internet access tries to access wireless. Sometimes (very) old people using (very new) MACs and having NFI idea of how to operate it whilst using wireless make life hell for me. Then there are also stray incidents of having to tell clients how to 'turn on' their PCs. You just take it with a grain of salt.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 6pm AEST
User #58059 169 posts Mark Grinceri Forum Regular	I used to work at Westnet Technical Support, Westnet was actually not bad to work for, some good guys like Luke were there but technical support was CRAP, hated it soooooo much, looking back I would actually prefer to work at McDonalds over doing tech support again. Too many cluessless & old people to deal with. I DON'T recommend it to anymore	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 6pm AEST
User #7411 18270 posts Alan Partridge Mangy Fleabag	Mark Grinceri writes... Too many cluessless & old people to deal with. That's the problem with being too good at something.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #4759 938 posts G. Thadeus Hog Whirlpool Enthusiast	Question, what was the site that he took me to? I remember a website that rather loudly professed the viewer was looking at gay porn. Should find it and try it with Telstra ;-)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #133245 2037 posts Alex R. OzSite Service Provider	Luke Harris writes... "Unfortunately that won't work, as the message is forwarded the software automatically ingnores the message as it's deemed to be wanted mail." Thats not the way ANY filters work. The correct answer is that something else...	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #158356 43 posts Not My Name Participant	I had a user who was faced with a form that said: Enter your first name (e.g. "John"): Enter your surname (e.g. "Citizen"): Enter your full name (e.g. "John Citizen"): ...and needed to call the helpdesk to find out the answers. That form's verbatim, by the way - it included the examples.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #139019 169 posts Cro_Crx Forum Regular	I had a customer that had signed up for ADSL and their line was complete. They wanted to get online with the modem from their old provider. When i asked the customer what model the modem was she did not know, she couldn't find any markings on the modem at all. I asked her to explain what it looks like to me, she explained it was beige and square. After telling her to contact her old provider to find out what modem they had sold her she got furious, she told me she already contact them and they didn't want to speak to her. Then i got her to read out the sticker on the bottom of the modem, which only had the serial, and one other line which read "ITU-T v92" ... She was on dial up with her old provider. I can't remember what happened next, I think she canceled her account, not sure! Another time i was speaking to a man in his late 80's, his hearing was very poor, all I did to get him back online was a power-cycle, it took the best part of 25 minutes. It was very quite, not many others around me were on call. All you could hear coming from my area is me shouting into the phone "CAN YOU SEE YOUR MODEM" The customer kept telling me to speak up as his hearing was very poor. This started to make everyone around me laugh, me screaming into the phone so the customer could hear me, I had to say something about 5 times before he could hear me. Anyways, 25 minutes and a power-cycle later he was back online.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #114570 1494 posts apacheoutlaw In the penalty box	I don't blame people for hating computers, they don't just work, it's as simple as that. What I hate is support guys getting paid the same as the person working the register at maccas. It's sick. If computers were a car they'd be a flapin daewoo with a 1983 holden camira engine in them. They're shit. In built obselence etc.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #4759 938 posts G. Thadeus Hog Whirlpool Enthusiast	apacheoutlaw writes... What I hate is support guys getting paid the same as the person working the register at maccas. It's sick. I agree - these tech monkeys get paid too much, the bludgers.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 7pm AEST
User #112706 365 posts ampeg Forum Regular	This story was posted in an old thread a while ago, but because its such a ripper I thought I'd share it again. I used to work tech support an ISP which I won't name. And I posted a while ago about customer Bob (not their real name). I was asked to call Bob as he made a complaint that the service was dodgy and didn't work. Called him up to troubleshoot the issue had he hadn't spoken to tech support only called to complain. I asked him the usual questions i.e. "Light Status and if he had power cycled it or not." To my surprise he told that he packed the modem away as the service wasn't working. I asked him if were able to hook it back up. So after 30mins or so of him looking for the cables to plug it back in the phone went dead. I assumed that he would call back. Sure enough 3 weeks later I was asked to call Bob again (as much as I didn't want to) and the first thing he did was accuse me of trying to kill him. I asked how? And he started to explain that he blew the phone line up. And then demanded for me to arrange someone to come out to fix it all up for him. To which I explained that it would cost and it would need to be passed on to our team that handles these things and never heard or even spoke to Bob again. Then again I left said ISP to work in a bottleshop while progress in my Uni degree.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 8pm AEST
User #106126 1553 posts d3?d3 Whirlpool Enthusiast	The best I had when I was iiSupport. User: Hi, I received a SMS that my ADSL is active, and it doesn't seem to work. Me: Sure, I see that you haven't ordered a modem from us. Did you buy your own modem? User: No, the previous tenants left their modem connected to the line. Me: Ok can you locate the modem and tell me what make and model it is? User: Yeh one second, its very tiny hard to read. Me: I need to know the make and model could you please read it out to me? User: It says F-I-L-T-E-R Me: Can I place you on a brief hold? User: Sure Me: (Laugh my head off for about a couple of minutes) Told him to go buy an ADSL modem...a filter is not gonna do the connection. Edit: Typo	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 8pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-20, 8pm AEST
User #73054 5325 posts MickJT Whirlpool Forums Addict	Unknown Designer writes... B) A site focused on CP CP? whim me. I probably don't want to know, heh.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 10pm AEST
User #18247 1337 posts TSP Whirlpool Enthusiast	The best one I had was when I was at a school and the office staff couldn't find an N folder on the users drive on the server. So I go in to the server and search for the N folder and it had been moved to a P folder. So then I go back and inform the office staff the location the folder and everyone just cracks up laughing. Another one was when we needed to get an iMac repaired the apple place told us that they had fixed the fault and then they said "By the way what is the password to get in".	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 10pm AEST
User #187613 294 posts haxmuch Forum Regular	C = Child P = P*** ?? I think anways. From what he was using in that context, what else would it be. I feel like pranking some ISP's now ^^	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 10pm AEST
User #73054 5325 posts MickJT Whirlpool Forums Addict	Well, when I searched "CP site" on Google, not much came up. A few things about plants and cerebral palsy, but now that you mention it, it seems like you'd be right.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 10pm AEST
User #139019 169 posts Cro_Crx Forum Regular	My friend invented something called "Penalty Restarts" ... Everytime the customer says something stupid, or you know isn't true you make them restart their PC. Customer "Oh yeah.... my keyboard and mouse weren't working before, but i fixed them" Support Guy "Oh how did you manage that" Customer "I had the plug around the wrong way, the mouse plugged into the keyboard input and the keyboard into the mouse" Support Guy "You know their colour coded right ?" Customer " Oh, look at that they are!" Support Guy "Um.... yeah, I'm going to have to get you to restart the PC, if you could please" Customer "... But thats the fourth time!!!!"	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 11pm AEST
User #18247 1337 posts TSP Whirlpool Enthusiast	haxmuch writes... C = Child P = P* ?? I think anways. From what he was using in that context, what else would it be. Yes that is correct in a way. They couldn't locate the newsletter which was saved in a folder called N on the server. However I located the N folder in another folder called P just to clarify the story. Also - P = Pi	anchor posted 2007-Sep-20, 11pm AEST
User #187613 294 posts haxmuch Forum Regular	pic*? This is like a puzzle :D I am yet to get any tech support nightmares, i am in year 11, give me about 5 years and i will post one :)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 1am AEST
User #60005 7290 posts Sirikan Whirlpool Forums Addict	In sales there is "The customer is always right" in IT there is "The customer is probably full of crap". Now when i deal with a user all i want to know is: a) What the user thinks is wrong. b) Access to their computer. c) WMI is my best friend :)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 3am AEST
User #112505 2287 posts charliem Whirlpool Forums Addict	Ive been wondering lately....about those forms you fill in... What would happen if say, you put as your firstname, an SQL query that would delete their entire DB ? Some clown transfering it from paper to the DB entry doesnt even register that its an SQL query, lol...that'd be interesting to see how that plays out :P	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 5am AEST
User #21066 13500 posts Dudley Whirlpool Forums Addict	RanCid writes... Just want to know the worst calls you guys have ever received. 4:30pm on a Friday as the BBQ is just kicking off out on the verandah: "Our email isn't working.... can you take a look please."	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 6am AEST
User #110357 83 posts Norm The Nerd Forum Regular	Cro_Crx writes... My friend invented something called "Penalty Restarts" ... Everytime the customer says something stupid, or you know isn't true you make them restart their PC. Oh this has really made my morning.... That's too funny.. Thanks for that.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 7am AEST
User #14277 5316 posts FriendOrFoe Whirlpool Forums Addict	Anyone talking about the worst call obviously never supported "Internet TV" or whatever it was. My lord that device called horrific nightmares!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 7am AEST
User #29799 1503 posts Tatiana Whirlpool Enthusiast	RanCid writes... Just want to know the worst calls you guys have ever received. I believe my worst is any call including an old lady and Win95. you? Dealing with certain members of my own IT team mates are are just plain unhelpful and having to clean up their mess.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 7am AEST
User #66773 30 posts WIZZDING Forum Regular	Back when Telstra's woeful service was constantly falling over and they lost a lot of emails Customer:- Where not getting our emails again. Me:- Yes Telstra is still having service problems. 2 hours later Customer:- where not getting our emails again. Me:- Yes Telstra is still having service problems. 2 hours later Customer:- Where not getting our emails again. Me:- Yes Telstra is still having service problems. 2 hours later Customer:- Where not getting our emails again. Me:- Yes Telstra is still having service problems. 2 hours later And the next day and the next day.. even though you ask them to go to the service status page every time and find out for themselves	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 9am AEST
User #51614 191 posts Michael Forum Regular	I spent a few months doing support a couple of years back and the worst one by far was a typical customer who didn't know a thing about computers AND he was deaf AND he used a tele-type relay service to call up. So I had to relay instructions to the operator who typed it out to the guy, who would then type back to her and then she would then relay the typed message back to me...very...painful After an hour or so we were not getting anywhere so I think I convinced him to get a neighbour to help...	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 9am AEST
User #81602 2079 posts tasmanian guy Whirlpool Forums Addict	I was involved in a project and part of the project was to get end users to do some testing. I created a testing manual in Word, which had step by step guide of what to do with little arrows pointing of where to click on to in the screen shots of the application in the document. End user: Hi, the program isn't working.... Me: Okay, try closing it down and restarting (just like the IT Crowd). 2 minutes later. End user: Nope I click on it, and nothing happens. Me: What exactly are you clicking on? End user: The button where it says to click here. Me: Mmmm...strange....it is working here fine....mind if I connect remotely to your PC so I can take a look at what is going on. End user: Sure no problems. Me: OK.....that is the word document telling you where to click, you must have the application open that we're trying to test and click on the relevant buttons that the word document is showing you to. End user: Ahhhh...I wondered why it wasn't working!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 10am AEST edited 2007-Sep-21, 10am AEST
User #29281 932 posts atec77 Whirlpool Enthusiast	RanCid writes... I believe my worst is any call including an old lady and Win95. you? Lots of time ago when Dino oil was being made I had a call some weeks after installing the first cd burner I had ever sold ( cost 1400$ for a very slow scsi unit) and the sechatary not being there the cal went from the gm like this " my drink holder is broken? yup quite a day :)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 10am AEST
User #108412 292 posts ZoinKerS Forum Regular	charliem writes... Ive been wondering lately....about those forms you fill in... What would happen if say, you put as your firstname, an SQL query that would delete their entire DB ? Some clown transfering it from paper to the DB entry doesnt even register that its an SQL query, lol...that'd be interesting to see how that plays out :P the clown doing the data entry is probably entering it through a webform or desktop application. That application would have it's entry field inputs as sql command parameters so it would be just entered as text in the database field and you'd end up with a really complex username. But I'm sure there's a lot of webforms made by stupid programmers out there which just append the input fields to an sql query where doing what you suggested would work, but I doubt any ISP would have poor web applications like that. Except maybe dodo or other el cheapo startup ISPs.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 10am AEST
User #187613 294 posts haxmuch Forum Regular	You really think the big companies dont take backups? ^^	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11am AEST
User #108412 292 posts ZoinKerS Forum Regular	they do, but it also wastes time restoring databases. better to have a system in place where something so trivial shouldn't be an issue in the first place.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11am AEST
User #10593 398 posts Masschino Forum Regular	Sirikan writes... .. In sales there is "The customer is always right" in IT there is "The customer is probably full of crap". omg that's why IT Sales can be difficult at times :P	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11am AEST
User #84502 130 posts Luke Harris Westnet ISP Representative	Alex R. writes... Thats not the way ANY filters work. The correct answer is that something else... Shrugs That's pretty much how it was explained to me at the time anyway. Fact is though, back then we used to cop calls about it all the time as the spam messages forwarded from another email address, to an address with the scanning service set up on it was released to the inbox without fail. Another hilarious situation I've been told about was; Tech Support; "Could you check your mail box now please." Customer; "Ok hold on..." Muffled sounds of a door opening, closing. A few minutes of silence then the same door opening, closing. Customer; "Nah there's nothing there, I checked it this morning." Tech Support; "Hang on a sec, did you just go out side..?!"	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11am AEST
User #189453 88 posts RanCid Participant	Luke Harris writes... Tech Support; "Hang on a sec, did you just go out side..?!" LMFAO. im yet to see someone this stupid, ill cross my fingers!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 12pm AEST
User #28844 631 posts kenaida Whirlpool Enthusiast	G. Thadeus Hog writes... I remember a website that rather loudly professed the viewer was looking at gay porn. Should find it and try it with Telstra ;-) heh it wont work... There behind firewalls that the Chinese Government would like to see on there own Internet users. ;)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 2pm AEST
User #57760 15 posts kc3302 Forum Regular	I did 6 months of user support a number of years ago. As a result I never want to deal with customers ever again! ----------------------- User: I got this internet disk and it isn't working. Me: What type of modem do you have? User: I don't have one yet. I thought I'd just try out the disk to see if I like the internet before I buy a modem. ----------------------- Me: Can you click the Start button? Windows98 User: I don't have a start button. (I knew instantly it was the start of one of those 1 hour calls to perform a 5 minute task) ----------------------- And the opposite: Me: Do you know how to open the Control Panel. Snooty female user: Of course I do, there is no need to be so condescending. I want to speak to your supervisor now. (Me quite happy to pass this call to supervisor and get a 10 minute break while he is using my terminal!)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 4pm AEST
User #32426 9138 posts know? Whirlpool Forums Addict	I once had to answer a call from a person who was blind. She only needed her modem configured since someone had already connected it all up. Was pretty unusual as she had her speakers on the in background and whatever she moved her mouse across it would read whatever was on screen. The entire call was ~30 minutes.. but nonetheless a pretty good experience.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 5pm AEST
User #102720 255 posts chrisoneau Forum Regular	I wanted a user to double click on the local area connection icon in the tray, so i said can you see the 2 computers near the clock? she said what clock i said the clock in the bottom right hand corner and then she told me the time :\|	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 5pm AEST
User #45482 812 posts hozozco Whirlpool Enthusiast	When I was in the IT industry I had a friend that used to work for Foxtel (or something like that). People would ring in whenever their 'box' crashed (I'm not exactly sure what it was exactly). One of his colleagues told every caller to turn off the system, wait five minutes and then restart, he would then hang up and move on the the next call and say the same thing again. If the customer insisted they had already done that, he would tell them to do it again. He won award for having the highest turn around time! :-)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 6pm AEST
User #89623 875 posts Alex12 Whirlpool Enthusiast	Worst tech support I've done was actually an on site call out where I was sitting on the floor with bits of machinery all around me and a big manager-type guy towering over me yelling about the equipment not working. For two hours. Seriously, he just stood there abusing me the whole time. My concentration was shot after about ten minutes, I was making mistakes. I asked him politely to stop a number of times, but he didn't so I just had to push through it by explaining what I was doing and how the equimpment worked. Eventually I just stood up and yelled back at him that he could fix the ***ing thing himself if I was doing such a bad job at it and left the busilding to cool off for a bit. Looking back at it, I'm surprised I lasted as long as I did. I ended up going back in, finished fixing it and leaving. I told the boss about it when I got back to the office and he called up fat-manager-guy's boss and said our company would take all the customer's equipment offline by close of business unless I got an apology faxed to me at the office within half an hour. It came through about ten minutes later. And then we got another one couriered from the customer's MD a week later, along with a crate of scotch. I still shudder thinking about it. The best one on the other hand was when I got a call from a client's PA about some issues she was having, which wen't something like this: "We're having trouble exporting the [access logs] from the [equipment's memory] and I tried rolling back the last software update that came through last night, but that causes a D0089 error, so I check the [electro-mechanical switch on the side under the [type of] cable and then I tried..." Went on for maybe 15 minutes, and she has obviously read the manual cover to -cover and looked some stuff up on the net as well until we got to...* "...so the only thing I can think of that might be causing it is an error in the second flash RAM unit, so I was wondering if you could reboot the machine?" Me: Sure. * I press a few keys on my terminal * Me: Okay, now you might need to... Her: Nope, its all working now. Thank you soooo much for that, you're a great help. Gotta run now love, bye! click I spoke like, seven words during the whole call.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 6pm AEST
User #160695 12 posts Bye TPG ,Hello iiNet Participant	d3?d3 writes... The best I had when I was iiSupport. User: It says F-I-L-T-E-R Me: Can I place you on a brief hold? User: Sure Me: (Laugh my head off for about a couple of minutes) Told him to go buy an ADSL modem...a filter is not gonna do the connection. Edit: Typo hahahaha classic im suprised you managed to keep your cool and not laugh again while explaining that they needed a modem =)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 7pm AEST
User #30250 5114 posts RchX Whirlpool Forums Addict	User: I hear the computer making a weird clicking sound when navigating between web pages. Me: Yes - That is coming from your speakers and part of Windows - It's a sound effecgt.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 10pm AEST
User #97257 25 posts sostheboss Forum Regular	I worked in techinical support for an ISP for 8 months. Everyday was riddled with error 998 and 999... End user Equipment incorrectly configured or End user is a f##kwit... I'll NEVER EVER go back to supporting customers. Some were good, some were bad, and then there were "I'm an IT tech" calls............................ I really enjoyed being called a useless fu##ing c##t because the client hadn't plugged the modem into the power point. And yeah, he informed me TWICE that he had plugged it in... I'd even got him to trace where the cords ran too. Whirlpool forums for ISP's just make me cringe with the amount of end user STUPIDITY floating about in them... The amount of customers that are CCIE, CITRIX, MCSE, PhD Comp Sci etc with their amazing informed 300,000 hand experience.... Yep, I'm having a vent at customers who call and think they know everything. They wouldn't call if they knew everything. They don't know provisioning, they don't understand wholesale SLA's, they don't understand what is acceptable as far as speed, if you make "thousands a day" then why do you use a residential grade 256kb connection with no SLA??????? Helpdesk for an ISP = Loss in faith for human goodness and commonsense. End rant for cathartic pleasure.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 10pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-21, 10pm AEST
User #148006 148 posts DeepFritz Forum Regular	I want to play to. Never worked level 1 helpdesk. Only ever done level 2 (where you visit people face to face... It still gets amusing though. Got given a ticket (B-Priority - The user can not proceed - otherwise known as the highest priority that level 2 helpdesk has to deal with where I was working). The problem was that the user had reset his screen size (to something like 1600x1280) in order to make his background picture of Danni Minogue (which was a 150x200 pixel jpeg) bigger on his screen. The screens had max resolution of 1024x768 using WinNT... As this person was fairly senior in terms of company rank - I was given strict instructions by both my team leader and the area manager (DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT LAUGHING WHEN YOU FIX THIS!! and DO NOT MENTION THIS TO ANYONE!!). I still can't get over it though - why would you EVER prefer Danni to Kylie?!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11pm AEST
User #115885 55 posts Sean1968 Forum Regular	Many moons ago, I was working for a company what wrote accounting software, a lot of the times if the user was having issues that we couldn't solve over the phone, we got them to mail us a recent backup of their data so we could check that for any corruptions in data. Anyway one client we asked her to do that, we said can you make a copy of your backup disk (3.5 inch ) and post it to us. A few days later we received an envelope from the client, opened it up and there was a photocopy of her floppy disk :-) S	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11pm AEST
User #67880 131 posts cstan11 Forum Regular	was working as a tech support for petrol kiosk. some guy called up and said it is an emergency and needs me to log a level 1 (top priority) case. me: "can you give me your kiosk ID and explain to me what happened to the terminal system?" poor guy: "one of the pump is on fire!" me: "..." I told him there is nothing I can do because it was not a computer related item. DEERR. Hung up, called back 10 minutes later to make sure he is still alive.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-21, 11pm AEST
User #33633 1780 posts Louie L Whirlpool Enthusiast	Torytroll writes... TT: "No, we don't seem to be getting anywhere. What do you see in the very top left hand corner?" Luser: "Well, there's this little Apple symbol" I think the more WTF is that it took you 45 minutes to realise he was in fact using a Mac.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-21, 11pm AEST
User #142620 111 posts syn0ergy Forum Regular	The funniest call i had got was back in 2006. This gentleman judging from his voice was around mid 30's and his wife was out of town attending a conference over the weekend. and was due to arrive in an hr. The wife had left her work laptop at home, and this gentleman got onto the internet looking at P* and as usual clicking on all those nice "Popups" and several dialers and ad ware programs, which pop's up when the laptop is restarted. The poor b*d was sh* himself to get rid of it. We tried everything to uninstall it but there was far to many. lol the guy was so desperate that he offered me to come around to his house and fix it. While on the call in the background noise "Doorbell Rings" User : 'S* she is home i am so dead (for lack of a better word)	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 12am AEST
User #42608 1263 posts Marty Whirlpool Enthusiast	Michael writes... he was deaf AND he used a tele-type relay service to call up. Poor you. Luckily, deaf people can use MSN to make a telephone call instead of using the TTY now.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 3am AEST edited 2007-Sep-22, 3am AEST
User #32445 10421 posts racka Whirlpool Forums Addict	charliem writes... What would happen if say, you put as your firstname, an SQL query that would delete their entire DB ? If the developers had any clues at all, SQL injection isn't possible. I would seriously, seriously doubt that a major CRM app would have that kind of vulnerability. Having said that, I have several years experience in Telstra's CRM software, and nothing surprises me any more.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 3am AEST
User #143884 293 posts bloodvial Forum Regular	.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 8am AEST edited 2007-Sep-22, 9am AEST
User #63124 1243 posts pipsqeek Whirlpool Enthusiast	I had a customer ring me once saying he got a recommendation from a friend that I was "good". Then went on to ask me if I would like to take family photos off 2000 (two thousand) floppy disks and burn them to CD (Not DVD because his machine doesn't have a DVD-ROM drive). I told him the costs at my going rate. It came to a rough estimate of $7500 for the hours, media, the very likely fact of farting around with crap FD's which undoubtedly have errors, the media I use, the wear and tear on my burners, electricity, my sanity, etc. He didn't say a word for 10 seconds. Then he said "I was expecting something like $30." I said "the 5 mins you've spent with me is worth more than that." Sadly he didn't take the offer. :) pip	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9am AEST
User #143884 293 posts bloodvial Forum Regular	.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9am AEST edited 2007-Sep-22, 9am AEST
User #94752 767 posts Not Me Whirlpool Enthusiast	I would like to say its not always the customer's fault. I hold a place in the deepest pits of hell for IT salesmen, the worst, most disreputable, lying scum of the universe. In the mid 80s I was doing technical support for a company that is now long gone (and not at all missed) who sold multiuser unix based systems. These systems were based on Intel 80286 hosts that had multiple serial terminals connected. The systems ran office apps (GL and word processing, spreadsheet etc). It was essential, considering the power (or lack of) that these systems had that they were spec'ed properly for the number of users that would be orking on them. I got the call assigned to me that one customer was unhappy with the performance of their system and to go out and fix it. On arriving I found that the system had been configured with the base level of host and over twice as many terminals as recommended for that level of host (24 terminals when the recommendation was 10). Added to that the customer was running all the office automation packages (full accounting, wp and spreadsheet) when the recommended config was to run accounting and office products on different hosts. The performance on this dog of a config was not going to get any better and I told the customer that it was underspec for what they wanted to do. I was told that this was the system the salesman had told them would meet their needs and I had to make it work. I went back to the office to talk to the salesman and asked him why had he sold this system knowing it would not perform? His answer was that he told the customer what the proper sized system would cost and they could not afford it so he sold them something they could afford, even though it would not do the job. He said it was OK because he had got his commission and it was supports problem now. I escalated this to his manager (also a salesman) and got told "Suck it up, its your problem not ours." I went back to the customer told them the salesman had lied to them and they should sue the company and if they needed any technical witness to give me a call. I then went back to the office and resigned. The result was that the client told the company to take back the system and refund their money or face legal action. The company caved and refunded the money and tried to take the salesman's commission back, the problem was this scumbag had also resigned and taken up a new career selling boats!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11am AEST
User #67880 131 posts cstan11 Forum Regular	Not Me writes... His answer was that he told the customer what the proper sized system would cost and they could not afford it so he sold them something they could afford, even though it would not do the job. He said it was OK because he had got his commission and it was supports problem now. sounds like a fantastic salesman to me! or extremely stupid client. i worked in a software developement company and yep, the sales director is not the most popular person for the developement team. impossible deadline, crazy specification, last minute change request. to name a few.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11am AEST
User #67766 403 posts Jeneth Forum Regular	Michael writes... I spent a few months doing support a couple of years back and the worst one by far was a typical customer who didn't know a thing about computers AND he was deaf AND he used a tele-type relay service to call up. I hate National Relay Service calls... I used to get at least one every three weeks or so when I was in frontline support. Now I'm in Tier 2 I so far haven't gotten any Relay calls yet touches wood. If they have access to the internet I just tell them I'll e-mail them the instructions, but it really sucks if you have to troubleshoot their internet connection or something. Once I had a 1 hour NRS call where the problem was simply that the computer wasn't getting an IP address from the router - all that needed to be done was to set a static IP address on the PC. This took 30 minutes to do. After doing that, it still didn't work... Turns out that the bloody relay operator had stuffed up and their typed instructions to the customer had the IP address and the default gateway the same!!! Another 30 minutes to change the IP address to something different, and it was finally fixed! Wasn't too impressed with that operator to say the least.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11am AEST
User #188866 2 posts ajai-leo I'm new here, please be nice	i have got one for you guys.....i work for tech support for an isp and one lady called up to say that she needed help... i asked what's wrong......she said my computer won't start...... i said what can i do over the phone..its ur computer..check the cables and other stuff....she said it was working fine when i was on dial up..i connected to broadband yesterday and today its not working........you guys have done something to it......i politely said " ma'am we cannot do anything from here..we are ISPs , we can just give you an internet connection and nothing more than that." GUESS WHAT SHE SAID ??? she said " you people gave me a broadband speed that is too fast for my pc to handle and now my hard drive is burnt due to the very strong signals from your broadband service...u did it and u will fix it...." another 20min to try explain that it is against the rules of physics but eventually she went over to the supervisor........................ ............not complaining about the service but about me that i did not knew what i was talking about and they need to train their agents a bit more......lol	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11am AEST
User #10139 5119 posts Skyce Whirlpool Forums Addict	know? writes... I once had to answer a call from a person who was blind. I had a customer contact us who had churned (or otherwise transferred) from another ISP. Reconfiguring their router and email client etc was painless, as although they couldnt see the screen very well (3% vision), I just guided them with terms such as "3 tabs down", etc. The single best call I ever had while working in a tech support call centre. Worked at a pace that the customer was comfortable with, and he sent some pretty nice feedback as well, and was extremely happy with how smoothly things had went (and put some nasty words about previous providers) To keep on topic with the "worst nightmare" side though, Ive had some "fun" ones in the past. Ive had a customer ask me out to dinner after a support call (umm no thanks!). People who cant access the internet because their computer wont start, but as they cant access the internet, its the ISPs fault... ?	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 8pm AEST
User #39441 2316 posts tRock Whirlpool Forums Addict	Torytroll writes... 45 minutes later TT: "No, we don't seem to be getting anywhere. What do you see in the very top left hand corner?" Luser: "Well, there's this little Apple symbol" Hard to believe it took you 45 minutes just to work that little piece of information out. I hope you can reset user passwords faster than that!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9pm AEST
User #39441 2316 posts tRock Whirlpool Forums Addict	Louie L writes... I think the more WTF is that it took you 45 minutes to realise he was in fact using a Mac. exactly my thinking too!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9pm AEST
User #32426 9138 posts know? Whirlpool Forums Addict	Skyce writes... People who cant access the internet because their computer wont start, but as they cant access the internet, its the ISPs fault... ? Hah! Its even worse when they go to the TIO about it. It then becomes priceless when the TIO accepts the complaint and launches it against the ISP even though its nothing to do with them. Costs the customer nothing, but costs the ISP time and money	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9pm AEST
User #63282 1085 posts Dr Watson for Windows NT Whirlpool Enthusiast	The best job was at a government department, when a lady's scanner blew up. As the outsourcing contract with this department didn't allow for a breakfix unit to be provided while the other one was being repaired under warranty, this client offered to perform a certain sexual favour if another scanner could be provided on a temporary basis.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 9pm AEST edited 2007-Sep-22, 9pm AEST
User #151061 2304 posts ??Ky??D?? Whirlpool Forums Addict	Im only 14 so I've really only done a few call outs to earn some extra cash. I got paid �20 for sorting someones sound. I gave them a big long story about how there was issues with the [insert random bullshit here] when actually all it needed was a reinstall of the sound driver. :D	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 10pm AEST
User #178195 26 posts Vertical C Participant	Not an ISP but a phone company support call. About a week after Sept 11th 2001, customers phone had been barred for non-payment Customer: "You guys are worst than the terrorists at least they gave the people one last phone call before flying into the building".	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 10pm AEST
User #62440 6737 posts ~SiNEWAVE~ Whirlpool Forums Addict	G. Thadeus Hog writes... I remember a website that rather loudly professed the viewer was looking at gay porn. you spin me right round AHHH shit nooooooooo!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11pm AEST
User #67766 403 posts Jeneth Forum Regular	Skyce writes... Ive had a customer ask me out to dinner after a support call (umm no thanks!). Hehe I've had customers making offers like that as well... After I resolve their issue, a few of them have said things like "You've got my number there, if you ever feel lonely give me a call!!" or "If you're ever in this area, I'll take you out to dinner". Also a few older customers have offered to set me up with their sons or grandsons, lol (even if I were single... no thanks!). People who cant access the internet because their computer wont start, but as they cant access the internet, its the ISPs fault... ? Similarly, people who have a few computers connected to a router - one or more computers work fine and can access the internet, and one doesn't - of course this automatically means that it is a problem with the router, it MUST be a faulty product! "It doesn't work at all and I want it replaced!!"...	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11pm AEST
User #14717 3743 posts Vader Whirlpool Forums Addict	??Ky??D?? writes... I gave them a big long story about how there was issues with the [insert random bullshit here] when actually all it needed was a reinstall of the sound driver. Ok, so your only 14 but still, thats a pretty silly thing to do at best. Just a simple "Your sound card driver has got corrupted and needed to be reinstalled" was all that was needed, instead of feeding the client some BS. Not all clients are thick and if you keep doing stuff like that one will see through it and it will come back to bite you....	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11pm AEST
User #151061 2304 posts ??Ky??D?? Whirlpool Forums Addict	Vader writes... Ok, so your only 14 but still, thats a pretty silly thing to do at best. I know. I shouldnt have done it. Just a simple "Your sound card driver has got corrupted and needed to be reinstalled" I said that and was returned with a "well as long as it works". So when they asked afterwards what the problem was i told them some stuff i made up that sounded good enough. It wasent like I tried to charge more by by saying it was more complicated than it actually was. I just told them something that sounded good.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-22, 11pm AEST
User #8648 507 posts Glidah Whirlpool Enthusiast	me: "I have just reset your password to password" user: "how do you spell password?" :rolleyes:	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 12am AEST edited 2007-Sep-23, 12am AEST
User #151061 2304 posts ??Ky??D?? Whirlpool Forums Addict	Glidah writes... me: "I have just reset your password to password" user: "how do you spell password?" People like that dont deserve to have a computer.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 12am AEST
User #132514 296 posts Disco Man Forum Regular	hahaha!!! I had a few good laughs reading this thread. I thought I might tag in as well. I, myself also worked in tech support for an ISP for almost 18 months. Let me tell you some of my hilarious support calls that I done. #1 user: my internet is not working and I know its all you guys fault. me: why do you say that? user: Im a pc tech, I know all these sort of stuff. me: thats good then. what sort of modem do you have? user (shouted): Netgear!!! me: what sort of netgear modem? user: I dont know. Its just a netgear modem. me: well, netgear has at least 10 different models. can you tell me which one it is? user: I have no idea. (then read out random bunch of barcodes) me: NO. that's not the model number user: Oh, how the hell am I supposed to know this? me: I thought you said you are a pc tech. user: THAT'S IT! IM GOING TO Dodo! (hung up) #2 user: my internet not working me: ok. which lights are showing on your modem? user (shouts): WHAT? WHAT DID YOU SAY? me: I said which lights are showing on your modem? user: Pardon? you have to speak louder. I have a bit of trouble hearing. me (shouts): I SAID, WHICH LIGHTS ARE SHOWING ON YOUR MODEM? user: what? I still can't hear you. (15 minutes later) me (shouts): I CAN'T HELP YOU. YOU CAN BARELY HEAR WHAT I SAY. user: if you just have a bit of patience with me. Im sure we can do this. me: I TRIED EVERYTHING I CAN. BUT YOU SEEM TO HAVE A VERY SERIOUS HEARING PROBLEM. GET SOMEONE WHO CAN HEAR A LOT BETTER THAN YOU LIKE A FRIEND, RELATIVES, FAMILY MEMBER OR EVEN A NEIGHBOUR. user: why can't you help me? me: COS YOU DON'T SEEM TO KNOW HOW TO USE PC AND YOU ALSO CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING I SAID!!!!!!! after another 5 minutes convincing. the customer finally decided to give up and get someone who can hear a lot better to call back and help him with the issue. #3 (after a series of normal troubleshooting of a dsl drop outs with an old fashioned guy who likes to grumble in a funny way.) me: ok. so what I need you to do now is to unplug everything out of the phone socket. then plug the modem directly into the socket by itself. I'll call you back on your mobile to run through it with you. user: righdo!!! I then called the customer back on the mobile. And all I got was a voice message saying "the mobile service you trying to call is not available. please try again later." So I gave up as the chance of me getting the same guy in the next few calls should be pretty rare. (an hour later) user: hi! I was talking to the other bloke before about my internet drop outs. but he never seemed to call me back. me (trying very hard not to laugh): hmmmm not to sure why. all I can see here in the notes was that he tried to call you before. user: well, at least he could have tried to call me back again in 10 minutes or so. me: (once again, trying hard not to giggle and just pretending that he was talking to some other dude before when that "other dude" was also me.) I think he's really busy so he wasn't able to get back to you after a few attempts. (unfortunately, I still had to finish the troubleshooting stuff with him to escalate the issue.) user: you know, sometimes the internet does work for about 10 minutes. and I get super fantastic speed. me: yes, I know. but do you think you will only be using your internet for 10 minutes? LOL!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 1am AEST
User #46413 1480 posts Red Jack Rackham Whirlpool Enthusiast	First up - I dont work in Tech Support. I dont even work in IT - (apart from my hobby building PC's for family and friends.) I do however work in a big 5* hotel in the city - and in the hotel we have an internal wired and wireless broadband system for guest use. Guests dont like having to make an external call to our support service if they have issues getting online. So a few of us have gotten quite used to assisting in this area on site. Here is approx conversation between me and a guest in our quite busy lobby. Guest: I cant get online in wireless Me: Is your wireless card switched on Guest: I work for f++++g Microsoft - of course the card is switched on. Me: Type in CMD and then ipconfig and see whether it gives our ip Guest: No - Nothing - You bloody internet signal isnt strong enough. Me: Sir - you are sitting under 4 different AP's - one of them should be strong enough Guest: Whats an AP. Me: An access point - you are sitting directly under an access point. Guest: Well its not working is it? Me: The gentleman sitting behind you is getting a 95% signal, are you sure your wireless is switched on? Guest: Of course it f++++g is - I have been using it at our office all day on f++++g wireless Me: Do you mind if I have a look? Guest: are you calling me incompetent? I have told you I work for bloody Microsoft - I know one end of a laptop from the other you know Me: 30 seconds sir - I will see what I can do <Pause> - then "TAP" Me: Sir - your wireless card was inactivated - you just need to tap that little blue button above your keyboard to activate it. Me: There we go - your signal is now on Strong - hope you have a great evening sir. Guest: <Pure Silence> 2nd Guest sitting behind; Guess that why Vista doesn't work then eh? Guest: <Still Silence>	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 2am AEST
User #151061 2304 posts ??Ky??D?? Whirlpool Forums Addict	Red Jack Rackham writes... Guest: I cant get online in wireless LOL. Thats a classic. Guest: I work for f++++g Microsoft - of course the card is switched on. Righhhhhhhhhhhhtttttttttttttt..... ......... Guest: Whats an AP. LOL. And he works with microsoft? 2nd Guest sitting behind; Guess that why Vista doesn't work then eh? LOL. What does he do. Should have asked him his position in microsoft. He's probably head of netwoking division. As much as I like vista the networking setup is the only part I can honestly complain about. Except for my webcam but �20 remmedied that.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 2am AEST
User #116852 719 posts unique7 Whirlpool Enthusiast	Luke Harris writes... Another hilarious situation I've been told about was; Tech Support; "Could you check your mail box now please." Customer; "Ok hold on..." Muffled sounds of a door opening, closing. A few minutes of silence then the same door opening, closing. Customer; "Nah there's nothing there, I checked it this morning." Tech Support; "Hang on a sec, did you just go out side..?!" Oh dude, thats the best!! Such a frigging classic.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 3am AEST
User #63282 1085 posts Dr Watson for Windows NT Whirlpool Enthusiast	Red Jack Rackham writes... 2nd Guest sitting behind; Guess that why Vista doesn't work then eh? Gold.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 11am AEST
User #10139 5119 posts Skyce Whirlpool Forums Addict	Jeneth writes... Also a few older customers have offered to set me up with their sons or grandsons, lol (even if I were single... no thanks!). oh lol! I just love the customers who talk about my accent too (Im caucasian Australian, with no foreign accent). I've been told by a customer that they "cant understand a damn thing through my Indian accent", have been told that I have a thick New Zealand accent, an Asian accent, an "unknown, but very audible" accent, and just yesterday, an English accent.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 4pm AEST
User #40966 4809 posts phoenixthesmeg Whirlpool Forums Addict	Skyce writes... I just love the customers who talk about my accent too A man/woman* of the world! * Assumptions should never be made LOL.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 4pm AEST
User #27476 605 posts caleula Whirlpool Enthusiast	Not Me writes... In the mid 80s I was doing technical support for a company that is now long gone (and not at all missed) who sold multiuser unix based systems. These systems were based on Intel 80286 hosts that had multiple serial terminals connected. Memories ... wasn't a certain Northern Suburbs bus company perchance?	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 5pm AEST
User #67766 403 posts Jeneth Forum Regular	Skyce writes... I just love the customers who talk about my accent too I get that too, lol. I too am a caucasian Australia with a predominantly Australian accent, but sometimes customers ask me "So what's the weather like today in Mumbai??", and when I was doing frontline support a few customers would say "I want to speak to someone in Australia!!!" after I finished my opening script (some of them were rude and would just interrupt me, felt like say "Well, if you actually listened to me instead of rudely interrupting, you would hear that I am Australian!"). Once a customer was full on questioning me to make sure I was in Australia... Customer: I want to speak to someone in Australia Me: I am in Australia, what can I help you with? Customer: Where abouts in Australia are you? Me: I'm in Sydney Customer: Where in Sydney are you??? Somewhere like GOSFORD?? Me: Uhh, no. Gosford is not in Sydney, it's on the Central Coast. I am in North Ryde. Customer: Oh, um, okay... I just want to speak to an Australian. Were you born in Australia?? Me: Yes! I was born in Australia, I am an Australian, and my family are Australian! Now, what can I help you with?? On the other hand, as soon as some of them hear me talk they straight away say "WOW you speak English and I can understand you!!!" instead of giving me their case number, lol. Quite a number of customers have thought I'm British or American, and asked whereabouts in the US I am located or originally from, etc. That's understandable though as my boyfriend grew up in the US, so sometimes I pick up some of his accent hehe. Though sometimes they think I'm American when all my words are in a completely Aussie accent, so that's a bit odd, but then the company I work for is American so I guess they expect it. What I hate most are the sexist idiots that go "I want to speak to a technican now" as soon as they hear my voice - just because I am female they assume that I have no technical knowledge and am just some kind of receptionist or something. Grrrr... It can be funny though, some of these types of customers have been network technicians and when I tell them to set a static IP address they're like "how do I do that??", or I suggest to them to back up data first before doing something and they ask "how do I back something up??"... and you call yourself a technician, but think that I'm not one??? Riiiiiiight!!	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 6pm AEST
User #73054 5325 posts MickJT Whirlpool Forums Addict	Customer: Mouse isn't working! Me: Is it plugged in, what were you doing when it happened? Customer: It's plugged in, it just suddenly stopped working when I was browsing. I've rebooted and it still doesn't work. Turns out the mouse wasn't plugged in firmly and has been slightly pulled out of the socket at the back of the tower. .. and there's those who stick the USB cord from their Bigpond cable modem into the Ethernet port on the back of the tower.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 6pm AEST
User #38640 5729 posts Jason M.D. Whirlpool Forums Addict	Unknown Designer writes... Question, what was the site that he took me to? A) Goatse you got goatsed by a customer? HAHAHAHAHAHA if it were me that got goatsed i would have shared a laugh with the legend on the phone and tell my mates around me aswell so we can all have a nerdy laugh together	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 6pm AEST
User #10139 5119 posts Skyce Whirlpool Forums Addict	jas0n writes... you got goatsed by a customer? HAHAHAHAHAHA I suggest you re-read his post. He didnt get sent to THAT Jeneth writes... On the other hand, as soon as some of them hear me talk they straight away say "WOW you speak English and I can understand you!!!" instead of giving me their case number, lol. Thats when you say something along the lines of "and I can tap-dance too!" some of these types of customers have been network technicians and when I tell them to set a static IP address they're like "how do I do that??" Haha yes the so-called "techs" are brilliant... had a tech call up about DSL sync troubles at a clients premises... had to explain to him 3 times why you dont filter the modem. Thankfully Im no longer taking customer calls, and do email correspondence for customers for sales, accounts, and tech support emails, along with a fair amount of behind-the-scenes work.	anchor posted 2007-Sep-23, 9pm AEST
User #92648 2566 posts beardedgeek Whirlpool Forums Addict	yea we get calls from some "techs" too , that you know are the 30$ hr beauties. anything that can't be fixed by a re-format is out for them. normally they go along the lines of me : "i'll send you our instruction sheet on what needs to be portfowarded for the pcanywhere setup to work , that should give you all you need to make it work" <it's basically a part off the symantec site saying what ports and protocols need to be used and a few labels it'll be under in their router(portfowarding, triggering,virtualservers), and the idea of making the pc it's fowarded to a static address etc. what then happens them:"ohh i've never actually done this before can you step me through it." me:"login to their router, and follow the instructions i've sent, what model router is it" them : " ohh i think it's a dlink, they are just the best i've found" me:"ohh well you'll probly find it under virtual servers then, just follow the sheet i sent you and it'll all be good , give us a bell back when you are done and i'll test it from our end" 5mins later them :" ok so i've gotten into the modem what do i do now" me:"have you read the instructions, make the ip a static ip and foward the 2 ports listed" them:"and how do i do that" <you are a god damn tech, this is something that should be obvious if you are going out to set it up , that you should know how to do this> me:"ok load up a browser window , type in <address to our remote control web app> , i'll do it from here then them :"ohh ok then, so like you have control of the pc now" me:"yes stop moving the mouse around or you may break something:" <2mins later it's all setup> them:"ok can you go over what you just did" me:" it's all in the page i sent you , seams to be working now , cya" me:<to manageing accountant " i just spent 20mins helping out the client, send along the bill and tell them to find a real tech this one was a ditz"